Reflections on Love, Time, and the Things We Don’t Say

musiclyrics

Feb 14

Celebrating 26 Valentine’s Days & 25 Years of Marriage

*The very first photo we took together at the former Manhattan Mall Photo Booth*

Valentine’s Day has always been special, but this year, as my wife Jeesely and I celebrate our 26th Valentine’s Day together and prepare for our 25th wedding anniversary in October, I find myself reflecting on the journey we’ve taken.

A journey filled with love, laughter, struggles, and growth—a journey that, in so many ways, is captured in the song I wrote nearly two decades ago: The Things I Don’t Say.

When I wrote it back in 2006, I didn’t know it would become a time capsule of our love story. I didn’t know that, years later, I’d revisit it and see the ways we’ve changed, the ways we’ve stayed the same, and the ways love continues to evolve.

So today, I want to share a few stories behind the lyrics—memories that shaped this song and still make me smile (or shake my head) to this day.

(Back Then) Love Was a Staten Island Ferry Ride at Sunrise

📍 “(Back Then) Every day we’d watch the sunrise…”

When you’re young and broke, you get creative with romance. Jeesely and I were just two college kids in New York City with nowhere to go, no money to spend, and a love too big to be contained.

Our solution? The Staten Island Ferry. 🚢

It was free to ride, warm in the winter, cool in the summer, and best of all, endless. We’d sit there, riding back and forth across the Hudson River, just talking, laughing, and watching the sunrise over the city. We weren’t thinking about the future, bills, or responsibilities—just each other.

📍 “(Back Then) Did nasty things in New York City / On every single street and every single weekend”

Yeah… about that. Let’s just say we weren’t always behaving on those adventures. 😏

There may or may not have been some very public close calls—overlooking the Brooklyn Promenade, in a downtown Brooklyn alley, on the G train. I mean, when you’re young and in love, sometimes you take risks.

Fast forward a couple of decades, and… well, let’s just say that kind of spontaneity transformed into calendar invites.🗓️

📍 ”(But now) We look at our schedules before we make love.”

Yep, real talk—when you’re married, raising a toddler, and juggling life, spontaneity becomes strategy. But even now, when life is structured and busy, the love is still there. It just looks different.

Through Every Bump in the Road

📍 “So many fight within their own bed / They forget so easily why they wed”

We’ve had our battles. Some small, some big. And, yes, some were about movies.

📺 She’d fall asleep during my favorite movies—I mean, really, how do you fall asleep during a classic like Titanic? Meanwhile, I’d complain that she always picked cheesy, predictable rom coms .

Years later? Now we snuggle up and watch Outlander and Star Trek together, and sometimes I’m the one who falls asleep.

📍 “We hit every bump on the road / It wasn’t always a humble abode”

Truth be told, we’ve faced hard times. There were struggles, doubts, moments that tested us.

But through it all, we learned. We grew. And even when we forgot to say it, we always knew—we were in this together.

What This Song Taught Me

Looking back, I realize The Things I Don’t Say wasn’t just a song for Jeesely—it was a reminder to myself.

A reminder that:

❤️ Love isn’t just in the grand gestures—it’s in the everyday moments.

❤️ Love changes, but it doesn’t fade.

❤️ It’s never too late to say the things that matter.

So this Valentine’s Day, I’m sharing this song with you. Because maybe you’ve also forgotten to say the things that matter. Maybe life has gotten busy. Maybe your love story has changed over time.

But the love is still there.